Ok people. My MOM has ordered a copy of Spork. My Mom.
If my mom could do it, certainly YOU can.
Just follow this link and click on another link that says Pre-order your copy, and then select issue 5.1 (and, if you like, the comic book and CD, because they're guaranteed to be cool, even though they don't have anything to do with me). Then let me know that you did it so I can give you a big, wet, smack on the cheek (tongue included for free, just because I'm nice like that). And do it today, because today is the last day to get free shipping. I mean, I did it, and I get a contributor's copy. I just can't resist such a great bargain.
Just to titillate you even further, here is a little preview of one of my poems in the book:
Katine is dressing
slowly, her hands and arms
still weak in a way that promises
soreness to come. Her lover lies
slack-limbed and sloe-
eyed – occasionally twitching
along the lithe lines of inner thigh
ass, spine. Katine is
pleased the woman is still
shuddering. She struggles with the laces
of her bodice (some of the grommets
are lost) as her slick tail
moves from under a hiked-up petticoat
to rub its still-wet tip
along the curves of waist and hip. The
woman shivers and moans and licks
her lips and starts to say please
but does not.
I mean, HELLO? That is hot, if I do say so myself. Certainly worth a second look. Go on, take a second look. And then realize that you can buy the WHOLE THING for only $10. Plus a lot of other people's work. And just think about what other works would be included in a magazine that will print the adventures and exploits of Katine, The Quarter-Spider Monkey Seducer of Virgin Pirates (Who May or May Not be Her Wholly Human Half-Sister)?
If you refuse to be titillated, then there's just no helping you.