9.18.2005
2 precious gifts
Yesterday, our friends Christine and Ely agreed to watch Julia for a few hours in the afternoon so that Kristin and I could get some very-much-needed-sleep. We were a bit nervous because we hadn't yet left her with anyone and we'd had some very rough days with her having extreme reflux and crying fits (why we needed the nap, actually) but we were determined not to be over-protective, over-anxious new parents in this instance at least, so we managed not to give too much advice and instructions and just to leave.
We drove home, feeling very strange that we had no baby with us. We climbed into bed and started spooning and that's when it physically hit me -- Kristin and I hadn't cuddled together for a month (Julia's one month today!). Yes, we had all cuddled (after a manner) as a family, but Kristin and I hadn't actually spooned (our favorite sleeping position) since the baby was born. Why? well, our bed is 4.5 feet off the ground, an impressive platform bed that we made out of kitchen cabinets. Beautiful and excellent for storage in our small master bedroom, but not very practicle for pregnant women and babies. We''re so afraid of Julia falling off (and we do co-sleep, we have to, maybe I'll post on that a bit later) that we always sleep with her in the middle, between us. So, though we have been conscious of the fact that we haven't cuddled as a couple, it didn't strike us how much we miss it until we got the opportunity to do it again. And I'm just talking about cuddling here, we miss the other, too, but it's not like I'm going to talk about THAT on this blog. So thank you, Ely and Christine, for giving us the chance for 3 hours of uninterrupted sleep, but also for giving us an opportunity for some simple reconnection.
Ely and Christine also gave me an unexpected gift. When we arrived to pick Julia up, she was fussing. Christine told us that she'd been an angel the whole time, getting a little fussy at feedings and then starting to fuss for serious about 15 minutes before we arrived. I was very relieved, because as I stated above (and may blog about later today) we've had some rough days. So, Kristin and I walked in, and Ely was holding the baby and bouncing with her, and he seemed to really want to keep holding her, so we didn't want to take her from him, and then Christine suggested to him that maybe we wanted to hold our baby. She was still crying, and he turned to me, and held her out and I said, "oh, what's the matter." and she opened her eyes wide and stopped crying immediately and was happy as a clam. The gift -- now I know for sure that she knows me, and prefers me. And that pretty much made my day.
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That is so wonderful...i'm glad you guys had a chance to reconnect. It is so incredibly important. And way to go being tough enough to ask for the time when you needed it... :)
Love is an amazing thing. You love your baby, but it's so important to find time for each other too. I'm glad you had that experience and the final one reinforcing what you probably knew: Julia has really bonded to you.