Remember what I wrote late last night? Well, this morning I woke up at 7:05 (I thought the alarm clock was turned on, but it wasn’t hey—I haven’t had to use it for about 5 years) and my train leaves at 7:35 – and it’s a 10-15 minute drive to the station. No time to shower, so I threw a headband on my skanky, unwashed, hair (the grease makes the gray shine like diamond starbeams—blinding all who look upon me with the naked eye) and grabbed the first coordinated outfit that came to hand: pale khaki slacks and a light lime green sweater set. Let me repeat that, it’s important. Pale khaki slacks. Practically white. Can you guess what I forgot to grab in my panicked rush out the door? Looks like I’m going to Martha it again, because the dispenser is still empty, I don’t have time on my lunch to track some down, and I don’t want to make my seriously sleep-deprived wife drive all the way downtown with the baby to bring me some. I’ll be sitting up straight and walking smart, today, you betcha.
Addendum (look at me with the fancy lawyer talk)
I think I may have mowed over a few octogenarians walking with blind, pregnant women carrying premature twins… but I did make it on the train.